Often times, we feel lost, maybe a little confused. It all comes down to a feeling deep inside of us that makes us think we are not enough, or it pushes this trigger that causes us to want more. Maybe it's our programming. Maybe it's the media that pushes us to strive for more. Or maybe it's our own reflection of unworthiness. The answer is not something I am concerned with today and I will not be tomorrow either. I am, however, concerned with this question. I want to explore this question with you a little deeper but only if you're willing to have an open mind.
1. What will happen if I do not obsess about the future or the past?
What Will Happen If I Don't
Obsess About The Future Or The Past?
I ask this question because this feels like the root of a lot of our suffering as humans. We ask children what they want to be when they grow up instead of asking them if they're enjoying their childhood. We ask college students what type of job they want to get instead of asking them if they are maximizing their studies or if they're even learning. When was the last time we asked a college student what they learned today? We ask adults, in their late 20's and 30's where they want to live when they retire, but do we ever ask them if they're enjoying adulthood? We have created this landscape of consistently focusing on the future, a space that doesn't actually exist.
Now of course, none of this is wrong. I am not here to tell you what is right versus wrong, it's your life, I only care about using my life to ask you questions so you can expand. Hopefully, if you're ready for this material you will really sit with these questions, and hopefully you can find the answer that works best for your soul. I can honestly tell you that I make a budget every month and week because I am concerned about my retirement fund. I do not want to 'work' my whole life. This has been my year to learn about finances, to learn budgeting, and to focus on setting myself up for the 'future'. I see nothing wrong with making future plans, in fact, it's practical to have a desire to set yourself up for success. I do believe that there is a distinct difference between 'setting yourself up for the future' and 'obsessing about the future'.
Obsessing feels like one does not have control, it feels like one is seeking an outcome that they know is impossible because they're not exhibiting the behaviors necessary to create the landscape that they want. Setting yourself up sounds like you are thoughtful, like you are trusting the process, and sounds like you are willing to take it day by day to reach the long term goal. Is this making sense to you? Can you feel the difference in how I'm describing the two?
Of course, the same thoughts can apply to the past: obsessing about mistakes, beating yourself up because you hurt yourself or someone else. Does that seem like a happy way of living? At the end of the day, of course, you will do what you want to do but is it worth it? Is focusing on the future or past, to the point of obsession or stress worth it? Is it possible that you should or could practice staying in the moment? I'm not telling you that you'll be able to do it instantly, I am simply asking you if you are willing to practice something different especially if you're currently suffering via overthinking, via obsessing about the past, or via beating yourself up for decisions you've made.
I do not suffer with this. I do not struggle with this. I believe that I have a healthy balance of appreciating the nostalgia from the past, from practically planning about the future, but mostly staying present in the moment.
Comment below and let me know if you're willing to try, if you're willing to practice staying in the moment. And if you want more tips on this let me know. If you're struggling with it, tell me more about why, I would love to ehar from you. I will provide more tips and thought on it if it's asked for.
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